The best thing about the title of this article is that thy way you say boss is just like this >>> How to Say Boss. Debbie Warner is my Mom and anyone who knows my mother knows she is not one to mess with. Like I did not stop being scared of her until I was like a junior in college (which was last year by the way).
She taught me some basic lessons about being a boss that I was able to take with me through life. Remember the way I see life is anything that can help me as a person can just as easily help me as an athlete and vice versa. I will break it down for you.
1. Dont Be a Dummy With The Bread
Lesson number one from my mom was to not be too quick to spend the cheddar cheese on dumb things. This one was huge for me growing up because I saw how far my mom could make a dollar go. She clipped them coupons and was an amazing spender and because of that I was able to get protein shakes to drink after practice, and always had a decent pair of running shoes to roll with.
The comedian Kevin Hart made a joke about how he does not mess with athlete friends because they spend too much money, which in turn makes him spend too much money. I have been around athletes my whole life and athletes by far can be some of the dumbest human beings when it comes to what they do with their money. Or what they say they will do with their money when they get it. Like most athletes have already bought a house and 4 cars in their minds before they ever even make a dollar.
The basic life skill of saving money and not living for wants can go a long way and it builds character to be able to hold you back from doing something you want to do. I learned it made you look like more of a BOSS to not drop every penny you own on things you do not need.
2. Do You and I’ll Do Me
At my house growing up, I make no joke when I say we NEVER have people over. I found it so weird all my other friends would be like man we having this person over and that person over. Everyone else always had somone over but in my house it was just the quiet family of 4. My parents are both single children so I have no aunts no uncles we have a real quiet and small family. I’m the only one in the house who really runs the mouth piece.
As I got older I understood why my mom is not a big “I want the whole world in my house in my business type of person.” The most important thing she taught me was that she knew how to stay in her lane. She did not look at what other families were doing and try and one up on them. She really did not care, she did what she wanted in her way and rolled with it.
The is a key concept in being a BOSS. You can’t be an balling athlete if you always looking to your left and right to see what the hell everyone is doing. If they want to party or do something you not feeling, let them do them and you do your own thing.
3. Where I Was Has Nothing to Do With Where I Will Be
My mom told me there were days where she never had food to eat and all her money went to my brother and I. That was where she was but that did not have to be where she stayed or ended up… And because of that mindset, that was not where she stayed or ended up.
Here is the thing, you may be injured, or have had the worst season of your life. That in no way means that is your fate and the only place you can go. You must see that the past and the future can be two very different things if you let them. I myself have made some stupid decisions in the past. The choices only ate me alive when I refused to let the past be the past. You have to use the dark past to make a bright future.
4. Being a Class Act Comes First
My Mom was on more of a “do as I say… NOT a… I do as I do” basis with this one but I am happy she did this. For my brother and I being polite boys was not something we could choose to do. It was mandatory, she did not care how many touchdowns we were scoring or how fast we were. What matter to her is that we were level headed about it.
If you think of yourself as a human being first and an athlete second like everyone should this should be no problem for people. Remember the basic things that your parents tried to teach you when you were young and don’t forget them when you are in the lime light becuse I promise you it will not be forever.
5. Fear Who? Why?
I remember being at football games and seeing my mom getting into it with my own coach, coaches on the other teams, parents it did not matter. If you wanted it my mom was down to throw some bows, words anything it did not matter. She was not scared and she taught me to be fearless of other humans.
The lesson carried over very well to being an athlete because you can’t step in the field of battle scared of your competion. It just will not work out well in your favor. Always remind yourself that no matter how good the people or person you are facing is, they put their pants on one leg at a time just like you. They cry, they hurt, they make mistakes just like you. Once you remind yourself of that simple matter you realize there is no reason to fear anyone.
6. Stand Up
Hear me out. I could go to school punch a teacher in the face and I almost promise you my mom would come to school and bat for me. I was so bad in elementry school it was insane the things I did, yet when all the teachers tried to gang up on me and bring me down. My mom was the angry black woman in the school no one wanted to deal with because she always stuck up for her son. She knew I was wrong sometimes but she still stuck up for me in public and dealt with me at home.
In life we have to always stand up for what we beleive in. Stand up for the things and people we love…protect them. At the end of the day if you allow people to walk all over you or think that they can they will continue doing so just because they can.
So What…
My Mom has helped me a lot in many ways that have made me the athlete I am today but even more importantly it has helped me become a better person. All I can say to you is do not forget where you came from and what lesson you were taught growing up. Use them to excell both all areas of your life. I have no idea what my mom would think if she read this but all I know is it is about a 14 hour drive from Iowa to Toronto so I should be ok lmao. Love you Mom!
(original image by Loren Javier)
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Well written Ian. BTW. I like the ” stay in her lane” quote. Put some derivative of that on a Parilex t-shirt and I’ll buy
Thanks for the comment Greg! That would be an awesome thing to put on a shirt. I have talked with Justyn about it and it has been added to the list of ideas.